Dennis Dossett

Dennis L. Dossett
(All Rights Reserved)

    As I prepared to write this blog, I thought I knew what the topic was going to be, but I was soon corrected by “My Guys” (my Spirit Guides). I wasn’t exactly wrong, but I got the “horse before the cart” so to speak. I was focused on a problematic symptom (which I will come back to later in this blog) rather than its root cause. I now understand that the underlying problem is far more inclusive and important than just one of its symptoms:

• “Attachment is the origin, the root of suffering; hence it is the cause of suffering.” ~ H. H. the 14th Dalai Lama (1935-; leader of Tibetan Buddhism; 1989 Nobel Peace Prize)

    That’s a pretty broad statement, but it includes a host of “sins” (symptoms). There are many “symptoms” of Attachment that ultimately cause us to suffer—for example, anger, the need to control, and of course, Judgment which I wrote about more recently in the blog, “Der Richter und sein Henker.” In each of these examples, Attachment is the root cause of the symptoms so often mentioned in spiritual circles. And to what are people “Attached?” Very simply, the Comfort Zone, the domain of the Lower Self. As Maitreya (channeled by Margaret McElroy) expressed it:

• “So many souls think that the path to the spiritual is easy. They expect reward and material possessions. Being spiritual means letting go of all material needs, trusting that the spiritual realms will bring all that you need. It means having total faith. You can say, ’But Master, if I let go, I will have nothing,’ and I will say to you, ’When you let go, we can then provide.’ Letting go of the [Lower] Self is the hardest lesson of all.” ~ Maitreya (Newsletter #246)

    I first wrote about this topic (“Detach, But Don’t Be Detached!)” almost six years ago (time flies when you are having fun!), but I wasn’t really interested in the “problem” (negative). Rather, I was focused on the (positive) solution of “Nonattachment,” achieved by “letting go,” or “detaching” as Maitreya (channeled by Margaret McElroy) wrote about more than 30 times. I recommend reading that blog as an introduction to what follows. Since then, I have discovered other writers who have expressed it quite beautifully:

• “Detachment is not that you should own nothing, but that nothing should own you. Unfortunately, most people tend to associate this spiritual phrase with being emotionally cold and unfeeling. But true nonattachment is quite the opposite: it allows us to live in this world fully, without being attached to people, things, or thoughts that create suffering. ... Nonattachment is not about being a cold or emotionally dead brick wall. Instead, it’s about learning how to let go of the thoughts and emotions that create suffering. ... Once we can stop being so attached to our thoughts, we experience tremendous relief, inner peace, and a pervading sense of joyful well-being.” ~ Mitra Shahidi (American blogger & life coach)

• “Detachment implies distancing ourselves from a particular object or experience. Nonattachment simply means not holding onto, not grasping, not getting entangled.” ~ Frank Ostaseski (American Buddhist teacher & end-of-life-care author; The Five Invitations, 2017)

    But the symptoms of Attachment seem so natural, so “normal” that we tend to overlook the ways in which we and others suffer by not detaching from the details (what, how, who, and when) in our lives. These details offer us the security of the Comfort Zone—the Lower Self—as Maitreya put it. The lesson of Nonattachment frees us from fear-based emotions and responses. This opens the doorway to a whole new world of delightful possibilities in our experience of life. What a wonderful gift we give ourselves and others by exercising this freedom, our birthright as souls. But it is a choice, and only we can make that choice and act on it for ourselves.

    Let’s get specific for a moment. In the first three Steps Toward the Ultimate Life Lesson, I wrote about Judgment (an Attachment to my being “right” or “correct,” and your being “wrong” if you don’t agree with me or don’t do something my way). Judgment all by itself (even without support from its negative, emotional siblings and cousins) makes the difference between conditional versus unconditional Tolerance, Acceptance, and Respect. As a starting point, conditional anything would seem to be better than nothing, but it does keep us from eventually expressing the full, unconditional form of each step.

• “The majority of society tends to judge and criticize quickly when in a situation of confrontation, or when they meet someone who is different from them. Most of the time, they don’t even try to understand the other individual. You do not realize [that] what you do not like in another, is what you do not like in yourself. You are looking at a mirror image of yourself. You can say, ’I am not like that at all’, but it is what is hidden that you often do not see.” ~ Maitreya (Wisdom Card #85, “Understanding”)

    Guess what? In the higher vibrational Steps Toward the Ultimate Life Lesson (future blogs), anything that is conditional is a mockery, an imposter, a fraud. Conditional steps don’t just slow you down, they absolutely STOP any further progress toward the Ultimate Life Lesson. Until such time as we learn Nonattachment (and especially Nonjudgment) of ourselves (remember the “Empty Cup Principle” in last month’s blog?) and others, there will be no further progress toward the Ultimate Life Lesson at all. And the longer we persist in Attachment to anything (and everything), the harder it gets to change course, to learn the lesson of Nonattachment. Old habits die hard, and the more they are reinforced, the tougher it gets to change them. But that change ultimately begins with our choice.

• “Nonattachment—even or especially to one’s own self-image—is the necessity for personal change. If we are open to change and to new possibilities and perspectives, without buying into them blindly, we can grow.” ~ Peter Shepherd, PhD (1952-; English psychotherapist & personal development trainer)

• “The purpose of your life is to learn detachment so that you do not become carried away with emotions. What is detachment? Detachment is not giving any energy to a person or a situation, and focusing only on your own life. Focusing on your life means, working on your karmic debt, past life energy and lessons that you have chosen to learn in this incarnation. Detachment is also about understanding that everyone is a soul on a journey, and that each soul has their own lessons to learn. ... Detachment is one of the hardest lessons to learn in the journey of spiritual development.” ~ Maitreya (Wisdom Card #20, “Detachment”)

    But when we actually learn that lesson, what is the result?

• “The peace that surpasses all understanding is a situation of detachment, where no one mirrors for you anymore, nothing concerns you, and you have no fear.” ~ Maitreya (Newsletter #158)

    Attachment to outcomes is perhaps the greatest obstacle on the spiritual path. Letting go in any area of life requires a deep trust in the universe, in the overall meaning and purpose of existence.

• “Letting go does not mean forgetting; it just means we stop carrying the energy of the past into the present.” ~ Yung Pueblo (Diego Perez; American meditator, author, & speaker)

    In other words, letting go (Nonattachment) involves acknowledging any trapped emotional energy and then consciously choosing to take control of it (Conscious Living) rather than allowing it to take control of us. It sounds quite simple, but it is the major factor in spiritual stagnation. Believe me; I know. But like you, I am a work in progress. Think about that. Until next time,

Have a great month!


“Old habits die hard, but with a little faith and a lot of hard work, they die before you do!”
~ Dennis L. Dossett (Dancing with the Energy - Book 1: The Foundations of Conscious Living) ~