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5 Reasons Why You Can't “Get” an Answer©
Dennis L. Dossett
(All Rights Reserved)
I am in fairly regular contact with my Spirit guides—“My Guys”—as I call them, and quite often throughout the day we have a running conversation. I am accustomed to receiving their guidance and answers to my questions. However, I have experienced a number of situations over the years in which I asked Spirit a specific question but did not receive an answer. It doesn’t happen often, but frequently enough that I thought I should try to determine the reason why this occurred in each case. The following is a summary of my conclusions.
It’s None of Your Business
On more than one occasion I have been asked either by a client or by a family member for information about another person. Most of the time when this happened I drew a blank—nothing. One day, after being badgered repeatedly with “What does Spirit say?” Spirit finally answered with, “It’s none of your business!” No matter how well-intentioned such requests are, the information is private and should be treated as such. Only when a person’s health or safety are at risk should we even consider sharing such information, and even then it may not be appropriate. Fortunately, Spirit is always on guard for potential breaches of privacy and trust, but we (as counselors) have to be vigilant and always check with our Spirit guides before we answer such questions.
There have been a couple of exceptions to that general rule when I did receive some past-life information about an immediate family member, but it always came with the understanding that the information was provided only to assist in my understanding of what was going on and might be shared at an appropriate time in the future. The information was strictly for the benefit of that individual and/or their parents, but only after other considerations (discussed below) had been met.
The Timing Isn’t “Right”
This leads to a second reason why an answer to a question sometimes is not forthcoming. I have had several clients ask me a series of questions to which I replied with what I was told by my Spirit guides—usually after “My Guys” had first consulted with the client’s Spirit guides. However, sometimes the information flow is simply cut off with a response of “Not yet” or “The timing isn’t right”. My understanding in those moments is that an answer will be available at some point in the future. In fact, sometimes I am later (often soon after the client leaves) given an answer to the question, again with the understanding that it is to help me to better understand the client’s situation in order to be of greater assistance, and may only be shared with the client “when the time is right”. This may have to do with the fact that our Spirit guides cannot make things “available” or make events “happen” instantaneously. It can take some time for them to orchestrate opportunities or resources. Personally, I think that it is more often the case that the client needs time to “grow” into the capacity to understand the answer, the ability to accept the answer, and/or the courage to act on the information they receive.
Your Client Isn’t “Ready” Yet
So why isn’t a client “ready” to be given an answer—yet? Sometimes it is a matter of—for lack of a better term—“spiritual maturity.” This is often the case with clients who have come for general life counseling, but clearly have little interest in anything that smacks of “spiritual”. This is often due to fear (fear of past lives, fear of “metaphysical mumbo jumbo”, fear of stepping out of the comfort zone of their religions beliefs, etc.).
Sometimes the lack of a client’s “readiness” is simply a matter of “unwillingness” to accept a particular answer that might be given. Typical client questions in this category have to do with “why do bad things happen?” or “if God really loves us, why does He allow such things?” Most human beings don’t like having to accept responsibility for “bad” things, but are more than ready to accept responsibility for “good” things that occur in their lives.
Answers having to do with a soul making choices before birth about life circumstances, lessons to work on, or karma to repay are often just too uncomfortable to be “acceptable”. Even the idea that “your thoughts create your reality” is just too far-out to be credible to many clients. That’s okay. You can lead a horse to water, but you have no right to force him to drink. Such clients (like each and every one of us) will grow when they are “ready” to do so. Sometimes exposing them to such ideas can give them something to think about and maybe even grow into at some point. For many clients, however, that isn’t realistic at this point in their soul evolution. Such answers would only “turn them off” and make them even more resistant to change. Spirit is patient and so must we be.
Sometimes it is a matter of the client feeling “stuck” and searching for direction. They don’t realize that our friends in Spirit will not—indeed cannot—tell us what to do because that would violate our free will. Yes, they will provide guidance to us if we ask, but it is advice only. We have to take the first step in committing ourselves to a decision. Maitreya tells us that there are no “rights” and no “wrongs”, only decisions and learning opportunities. It’s not that Spirit is unwilling to help. Rather Spirit is nudging us to get out of our comfort zone, face our fear, and take a step forward in growth. They would dearly love to help us, but we have to do the work. Helping a client understand these “plateau” experiences is important. It helps to give them hope and maybe even the courage to take the next step forward in their spiritual development.
You Aren’t “Ready” Yet
Assisting clients who are searching for answers is one thing, but what about answers for ourselves? We are no different than our clients when it comes to “readiness”. Oh sure, we are less likely to be afraid of some religious dogma, but we all have our comfort zones and are still often reluctant to step out of them. And as long as we have a Lower Self (we physically reside in the illusion of the earth plane), we tend to avoid taking complete responsibility for every single thing in our lives until someone or something jerks us back to into reality. In other words, we—all of us—are all too human. Not that we don’t know better, but that is how we feel in the heat of the moment. So why are we, ourselves, often “not ready”?
A couple of times I’ve been given the message that, “You are asking the wrong question.” This is a variation on the message: “You haven’t done your homework.” In other words, I haven’t tried to find a suitable answer to my question on my own. As I said before, they love to help us, but we have to do the work! And what does the “homework” eventually turn up? Asking the wrong question or doing my homework usually means that I am looking “out there” for an answer that is really “in here”. More often than not I discover some doubt (usually about “things working out”), or I realize that there is actually some fear lurking in my subconscious mind. The “homework” is my answer, although I must admit to occasionally asking “My Guys” for confirmation of what I think (okay, what I know damn well) is the answer.
When I am trying to get an answer and there is no answer at all, it can really be frustrating. As I think about some of those moments, I was not in a relaxed state of mind at the time. Sometimes I was fielding rapid-fire questions from a client and couldn’t quietly focus as a result. Sometimes it was because the Self was having its way for a moment and I was upset, mildly irritated, or just distracted from what was in front of me. For me, it is almost impossible to “connect” with “My Guys” under these circumstances, and it is no wonder that I can’t “get” any answers. The solution is to realize that I am the problem and to take whatever steps are necessary to get myself into that “space” where I can communicate with Spirit quietly and clearly with love (just like speaking your truth!).
You Are Trying Too Hard
Sometimes the answers come before I even formulate a question. I just know. Without my eyes, my mind “sees” objects, people, events. There is a flood of information without asking anything at all. This usually comes when a client says something that “triggers” the flow, often without the client even asking a specific question. But sometimes when I am really trying to get an answer, there is no answer at all—nothing, zilch, nyet, nada. Once, when I asked “My Guys” why this was happening, they told me that I was “trying too hard”. This is very much about being relaxed enough to allow the energy to flow. Abraham expresses it this way:
When you continue to ask the question, you continue to practice the vibration of the question, which is different than the vibration of the answer. But when you quiet your mind, so that you are no longer keeping the question active, then the answer can come to you because you are not holding yourself in the tension of the unanswered question.” ~ Abraham (Collective consciousness of Spirit as channeled by Esther Hicks; Orlando, FL, January 11, 2014)
The lesson here is simply this: ask your question and then let it go. Don’t fret over not getting an answer immediately. Let it sit on the back burner of your mind, or as I wrote a few months ago, “Relax, Trust, and Do What Feels Good.” Be easy with it. It’s okay to try to understand why an answer is not immediately forthcoming. In fact, it can be downright helpful in many ways as described above. But don’t obsess about it. If it really is any of your business, the answer will be provided at an appropriate time. And if you are working with a client, explain to them what may be happening and why. You are not omniscient even if your client wants to think that you are. Tell them that you trust that an answer will be provided and that you will get back to them with whatever it may be.
I’m sure this list is not complete, likely because my spiritual education and experience are not yet complete. But if you have found yourself in this situation, don’t worry about it. Just “Relax, Trust, and Do What Feels Good.” Learn to use the silence of “no answer” as a tool for your own spiritual development. There’s an old saying that “silence is golden.” Take the silence of “no answer” into the silence of meditation. You might be surprised at the “pot of gold” you will find!
Have a great month!